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Turnkey Real Estate Investing

3 min read

Keys to Smart Investing When Your Spouse Has Different Goals

Thu, Oct 12, 2023

Couple casually arguing

When you’re married, you share a lot of things – your time, your meals, and, for many...your finances. Last year, surveys reported that 41% of households experienced finance-related tension. That tension emerges for various reasons – one or both partners carrying debt, not sticking to an agreed household budget, financial power imbalances, or different personalities and attitudes regarding money.

So, what do you do when you and your spouse are on a different page regarding investing? A gap between goals, expectations, and preferred strategies can be a source of contention.

Here’s how you can find common ground and build lasting wealth for your family.

6 Things to Do When Your Spouse Isn’t on Board with Your Investment Strategy 

Say you’re ready to invest. You have an idea of what you want and how to accomplish it. You're ready to get started, but there’s a hitch. How do you move forward when your spouse isn’t so sure or has entirely different financial goals?

After all, it’s not just about your money, it’s about your marriage!

Talk through your goals

Are your financial goals really that different? In most cases, we’re motivated to invest to achieve financial security in the present and future for our families. The differences of opinion usually stem from different ideas about effective strategies, measures of success, and risk exposure.

Talk through your goals with your spouse. Explore your comfort levels with risk. Talk about the kinds of returns you see as most valuable. Are you after dividends and passive income or a big payout at the end? Understanding one another’s goals and measures of success is vital to developing a unified investment plan.

Respect their point of view

First and foremost, respect your spouse. Negotiating these sensitive issues is impossible if you’re not approaching them from a place of love and respect. You might think your partner is wrong, but you can express concerns thoughtfully and without belittling their goals or financial strategies. Money can be a touchy subject in the best of times.

Make a priority of really listening to your partner and what they want and need financially. Find what you can both agree on. Approach any serious financial conversations with empathy, intention, and focus.

Get educated together

Apprehension regarding an investment strategy may be as simple as needing confidence in how it works and what it accomplishes. Your idea may very well address your spouse’s goals and concerns, but the gap in understanding prevents them from seeing it. Focus on educating yourself on your options. Misconceptions of preconceived notions can get in the way of seeing the right solutions.

Be sure you understand and can articulate your strategy to your partner.

Consider a happy medium

Depending on your resources, you can utilize multiple investment strategies. This not only helps keep the peace but also diversifies your investment portfolio. If your spouse wants to invest one way while you want to pursue a different method, crunch the numbers and see if you can do both simultaneously.

The key, of course, is that you contribute enough to make them worthwhile on their own. You don’t want to spread yourselves too thin. Investigate the logistics!

Keep your ego in check

Beware of the damaging effects of the human ego. You’re bound to steamroll your partner when you think you have the best plan, the right goals, and the final say on finances. You might think, “Well, it’s my money!”

Some couples opt to keep their finances separate, but many combine them. Respect that joint ownership. Beware of thinking you know best.

Put your marriage first

Ultimately, you must keep your priorities in check. Getting your way isn’t worth your marriage. If you know tensions are running high, get help. Retaining a financial advisor, counselor, or other qualified third party may help you navigate these disagreements with objectivity and expertise.

Be willing to sacrifice your preferences for your spouse. Advocate for yourself and your point of view, but don’t obsess over “winning” against your partner. Instead, work together to find the best path forward for your relationship and finances!

Need to work through your investment options? Talk to your REI Nation advisor today to see if buy-and-hold turnkey real estate is right for your family.


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Chris Clothier
Written by Chris Clothier

Entrepreneur, writer, speaker, ultra-endurance athlete, husband & father of five beautiful children. Chris puts these natural talents on display every day. As a partner at REI Nation, Chris addresses small and large audiences of real estate investors and business professionals nationwide several times each year. Chris is also an active writer, weekly publishing real estate, leadership, and endurance training articles.